Dec 24, 2010

What's in Your Heart?

This is a Xmas with plenty of green, and no, I'm not in Costa Rica staring out of the window of my hut with a coconut in hand, listening to the ocean, as many people seem to believe. I'm in Hungary, wrapped in my boyfriend's robe, at night, in an apartment, surrounded by green fields. Weather these days seems to be somewhat bipolar, rather than the usual "maniac depressive" self, so proper of these changing, schedule oriented latitudes. Not that I mind, as this allows me to lose one layer of clothing, but still. A Christmas-in-three-acts has begun Today. Act one: Christmas with my family.

According to an impromptu plan communicated to us today in the morning, we had lunch at my aunt's place, where my brother and his family are currently lodged. The present-constriction due to the loss of the luggage (due to weather, KLM has blatantly decided to lose each and everyone of our 5 pieces of baggage - for which I was almost made pay $100 for 3 Kg in surplus on 2 suitcases, while the other 3 ever over 5 Kg under the maximal weight alotted, EACH), was somewhat felt, but everything did their best to shower with presents the children, who got an enormous amount of presents, and the two Costa Rican's  - 100% Costa Ricans -  with us.

Act two is to be done tomorrow, when we have lunch with my father-in-law, whom I love to madness. Act three will be the lunch-and-afternoon with The Hag, from which I've excused myself months ago, given the fact that I'm so freaking sick, like you can't believe. Thus my boyfriend will go to the lair of the Hag alone, while I have lunch with my family, and spend some quality me-time with me. :-D I'll be reporting about these if the happenings merit it.

In this Christmas time interesting sides of people surface. Some show out the Grinch side of them, openly hating Christmas, others pull out the Christmas Depression face, which often looks like something picked out of a Christmas story, others pull out the all-over-the-place-I-wish-Christmas-lasted-all-year kind of fever, or the gushy side, or the corny side, the uber-spender side, and other take out the "Gift Philosophy" side. Some get more religious, others suspitiously turn towards the "the best gifts are not the expensive ones" and so on. Now, I believe that the presents that matter  -for any occasion - are the presents that have a positive, unique, personal meaning and intention. Call it "presents from the heart" or "presents with love" or whatever, I'm talking about those presents that are not the ones you exactly needed, or the one's that you asked ofr, but those that tell you something about what the person giving them to you wants to say to you: the thing you share - a story, a hobby, a memory - or the way that person sees you. The money matter is a matter for the person giving the present, not for the one receiving it, so money doesn't come in consideration, however a lot of people don't think that way even if they say they do. 

It never fails to amaze me how this happens in Christmas.  Often people who say that "presents that matter cost nothing" basically are saying that they don't have enough money, so they are sending ahead the message that they will give "poor presents" and expect to be forgiven for it. So, exactly what do we see in a present? A tool or a needed produce we require - which by some social artifice we can't get ourselves and expect to be provided for by our friends and family? A way to measure love in regards of size, number and price of the gifts, or the rarity of them (again a matter of money)? A social obligation to exchange whatever thing impressing enough to be a present?


Perhaps we could think of presents as a way to communicate. In a present, this way isn't the matter to give someone what he or she needs - just as you don't say only the words others need to hear - but you say to him or her something in a language you share. Dragonfly, for instance, never fails to include something green in my presents. This way she says "I know you are crazy about green". It's not like she thinks I need more green in my life, but she knows it happens to be my favorite color. Skylar never fails to give me something related to writing and a book (at least one :-D), because she knows I've a never dying passion for reading and writing. My aunt always thinks about youthful, yet not trendy or too young things. She reminds me of our relationship, which is sweet, as we have the same name. My sister-in-law always gives me something related to clothing, in connection to our shared love for shopping, and my Mom always gives me things that have a sweet, soft nature. Soft fabrics, sweet colors, tender details. It's her way to say I'm still her little girl.


Kari basically asks me for guidelines, so I give him ideas, and he works around them. His message is "I'm listening to you, yet I will interpret you my way, and that way is always the most beautiful one I can think of". My friend Laura has this way to pick gifts that always go back to our days at the University. They have a youthful, bohemian, traveler quality you simply gara love. It's like being back in jeans and T-shirts before we used make-up and plucked our eyebrows. My friend Roo's presents are all about fun, party and guilty, guilty pleasures. Everything is "OMG, Roooo!!! Hahahahahahaha!". Carrie's presents are all about shared fangirling items. Those are the kind of things that send you shrieking like a groupie all around the place. Almost as if you had unwrapped the real Jesen Ackles with a bow and a smirk.

How much do they cost? I've no freaking idea. Some are handmade, some are bought, some might be expensive, some might be a bargain, but all of them are so freaking awesome! So, when people speak about the importance of the cost in gifts, I always wonder "the importance to whom?".

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