First of all, "Mago de Oz" ain't half as bad as I thought it would be. Definitively, as humans, we shall give a change to different things, try them out, open ourselves to experience, and learn, swell with knowledge before we formulate and pass judgment. Like in a court, one must always hear the pros, the cons and weight the statements with evidence. Patience and eager learning are vital through life, since only experience will allow you to find your way around all presented evidence to select those that prove valid, those that can convince you, those in which you can place your trust. Not all words and all facts are solid evidence to decide on a way or another. Like a sword, all things brought up as evidence need perfecting, moulding, work to become trustable. A man's word and character above all of them. My Sweet Breath, actions, consistency, temper, determination and above all of them, sense of self are the beats and the hammer that turn the steel of your humanity into the fine sword of trust. Know yourself, be proud of your choices and yourself, humble with your mistakes, and swift in correcting your flaws, but always true to yourself, the one you feel you are, not the one others wish you to be, or tell you to be.
Live, my Darling, with no regrets, take to your heart all the joy the world have to offer, and take the time to swim in the little joys and little pleasures of life, and don't discard them. Happiness is like the wildflowers you find in the field: maybe one of them is too little, but if you take the time to pay attention, isn't the myriad of them, scattered ever so happy and colorful across the meadows and hills one of the most beautiful sights you can imagine? And so, my Child, is happiness. If you stop for a moment and live each happy moment, soon you will realize happiness has permanently moved into your life, and so, you'll also be able to enjoy the bigger joys of life as well.
There's people out there who will always live displeased, dissatisfied with their lives and what they get. Please take your time and watch them. Watch them carefully, study them, concentrate on their characteristics and learn from them, so you learn to avoid the mistakes they make, so that their miserable experience becomes your learning ground. Burn their misery, the sick feeling peeling from them in your mind and never forget it, so you think twice before detouring to their path. Watch, my love, how their daily bread is hopelessness and their wine the fruitless complaining. The hope is born from within your heart and fed by your determination and your actions, but so is hopelessness. There's absolutely nothing bad with breaking down and cry. Nothing wrong with getting angry and shout. If tears ever touch your lids, cry them. Bawl until your eyes puff and fall out, and if frustration becomes too great, anger too overwhelming, howl, scream, punch walls, shout at people and curse the world into the deepest, darkest, stinkiest pit of hell. But when the storm has winded off inside you, after you have vented, seek solutions. Problems are not to stay alone, but all of them must be paired with solutions, so balance them out. Pretend not that things will solve themselves, or that complaining is solution enough. That attitude is what separates happy, satisfied people from the miserable scum that crawls in the dark corners of existence.
Be analytical and realistic: solve the things you can solve, but those that do not depend on you, leave to God and don't even worry about them. Trust your mother: God knows better. You couldn't leave your issues in better hands, so what would be the point of worrying? Would you think that God, being God, would not be capable of solving the stuff you nicely ask him to do? Perhaps you don't trust Him? If you don't, I have not done a good job at raising you.
There would be loads of things I would like to tell you, but all those will come in time.
Three things I have filtered down to common wisdom in these days, which I wish to share with you, so you can profit from them, and think about them. Consider them the "Human Thesis" of your old mother.
#1: "Lo corriente de las personas no está en las palabras, sino en la actitud."
Meaning, that you must learn to value people not by a bit of their selves, but by the whole package. Words can be changed in seconds, ways of speaking changed at will from a moment to other, for a joke or a serious circumstance. A man can be a pig with his friends at a pub in a minute, and a fine gentleman in a diplomatic meeting in the next, but the core, the attitude can hardly be masked or changed. That's what matters. Learn, my Child, to value people not by their surface, but for what your heart and experience tells you, are the milestones of character.
#2: "Hay una diferencia radical entre Tolerancia y Alcahuetería."
Learn to discriminate between the things that deserve tolerance and those that are not. Learn tolerance to the differences of people, tolerate the different faces of human condition: politics, religion, orientation, believes, preferences... but deny tolerance to flaws. Laziness, incompetence, stupidity, violence, discrimination, debasing, corruption, mindlessness, ill behavior, character flaws. Tolerance shall never mean, either to give up or sacrifice yourself or your interests for those of someone else. Tolerance shall always be mutual. If someone or something you consider, you shall tolerate does not tolerate you for who you are, what you do or what you believe in, sever the connection and walk aways. You must learn to pick your battles as well, my Dear.
#3: "You are a Member of Society, not its Slave."
Yes, we live in society, but that does not mean you must sacrifice your individuality to please it. Follow the social rules that make the communal living easier, but do not subject yourself to all its demands or you will lose everything, and society will never replace your loss. You, my Baby, are responsible of your own happiness, so take it, don't pursue it: HAVE IT. PROCURE IT. As you start your actions, you step into an eternal domino game where all moves will ripple and have consequences. Be aware of them, shoulder them, learn from them and learn to turn them to your advantage. Lead your life because you are the only one living it, so only you can do it. Ignore all of society's expectations to your life, and live by your owns, for only that way you will be happy. Marry and have kids if you feel so. Drink, smoke and have sex only if you feel like it. Kiss, laugh, sing or dance when you see it fit. Chose, keep and discard your friends by your own standards and for your own reasons. Justify yourself before no one but yourself. Learn to watch and listen. People will always have an opinion about you and your life, your things and actions, you may listen to them if you feel like it, but know that those are opinions of outsiders, and the weight you place on them depends entirely on you. And no matter who says what, in the end the only opinion that matters is yours, for even if you decide to consider someone else's opinion, it is your opinion of accepting that information as valid what prevails.
Whether you die old or your, My Beautiful Dove, all that matters to me is that you live your time here as happily and satisfied as possible.
Loves You ever so Deeply,
Anya.
Live, my Darling, with no regrets, take to your heart all the joy the world have to offer, and take the time to swim in the little joys and little pleasures of life, and don't discard them. Happiness is like the wildflowers you find in the field: maybe one of them is too little, but if you take the time to pay attention, isn't the myriad of them, scattered ever so happy and colorful across the meadows and hills one of the most beautiful sights you can imagine? And so, my Child, is happiness. If you stop for a moment and live each happy moment, soon you will realize happiness has permanently moved into your life, and so, you'll also be able to enjoy the bigger joys of life as well.
There's people out there who will always live displeased, dissatisfied with their lives and what they get. Please take your time and watch them. Watch them carefully, study them, concentrate on their characteristics and learn from them, so you learn to avoid the mistakes they make, so that their miserable experience becomes your learning ground. Burn their misery, the sick feeling peeling from them in your mind and never forget it, so you think twice before detouring to their path. Watch, my love, how their daily bread is hopelessness and their wine the fruitless complaining. The hope is born from within your heart and fed by your determination and your actions, but so is hopelessness. There's absolutely nothing bad with breaking down and cry. Nothing wrong with getting angry and shout. If tears ever touch your lids, cry them. Bawl until your eyes puff and fall out, and if frustration becomes too great, anger too overwhelming, howl, scream, punch walls, shout at people and curse the world into the deepest, darkest, stinkiest pit of hell. But when the storm has winded off inside you, after you have vented, seek solutions. Problems are not to stay alone, but all of them must be paired with solutions, so balance them out. Pretend not that things will solve themselves, or that complaining is solution enough. That attitude is what separates happy, satisfied people from the miserable scum that crawls in the dark corners of existence.
Be analytical and realistic: solve the things you can solve, but those that do not depend on you, leave to God and don't even worry about them. Trust your mother: God knows better. You couldn't leave your issues in better hands, so what would be the point of worrying? Would you think that God, being God, would not be capable of solving the stuff you nicely ask him to do? Perhaps you don't trust Him? If you don't, I have not done a good job at raising you.
There would be loads of things I would like to tell you, but all those will come in time.
Three things I have filtered down to common wisdom in these days, which I wish to share with you, so you can profit from them, and think about them. Consider them the "Human Thesis" of your old mother.
#1: "Lo corriente de las personas no está en las palabras, sino en la actitud."
Meaning, that you must learn to value people not by a bit of their selves, but by the whole package. Words can be changed in seconds, ways of speaking changed at will from a moment to other, for a joke or a serious circumstance. A man can be a pig with his friends at a pub in a minute, and a fine gentleman in a diplomatic meeting in the next, but the core, the attitude can hardly be masked or changed. That's what matters. Learn, my Child, to value people not by their surface, but for what your heart and experience tells you, are the milestones of character.
#2: "Hay una diferencia radical entre Tolerancia y Alcahuetería."
Learn to discriminate between the things that deserve tolerance and those that are not. Learn tolerance to the differences of people, tolerate the different faces of human condition: politics, religion, orientation, believes, preferences... but deny tolerance to flaws. Laziness, incompetence, stupidity, violence, discrimination, debasing, corruption, mindlessness, ill behavior, character flaws. Tolerance shall never mean, either to give up or sacrifice yourself or your interests for those of someone else. Tolerance shall always be mutual. If someone or something you consider, you shall tolerate does not tolerate you for who you are, what you do or what you believe in, sever the connection and walk aways. You must learn to pick your battles as well, my Dear.
#3: "You are a Member of Society, not its Slave."
Yes, we live in society, but that does not mean you must sacrifice your individuality to please it. Follow the social rules that make the communal living easier, but do not subject yourself to all its demands or you will lose everything, and society will never replace your loss. You, my Baby, are responsible of your own happiness, so take it, don't pursue it: HAVE IT. PROCURE IT. As you start your actions, you step into an eternal domino game where all moves will ripple and have consequences. Be aware of them, shoulder them, learn from them and learn to turn them to your advantage. Lead your life because you are the only one living it, so only you can do it. Ignore all of society's expectations to your life, and live by your owns, for only that way you will be happy. Marry and have kids if you feel so. Drink, smoke and have sex only if you feel like it. Kiss, laugh, sing or dance when you see it fit. Chose, keep and discard your friends by your own standards and for your own reasons. Justify yourself before no one but yourself. Learn to watch and listen. People will always have an opinion about you and your life, your things and actions, you may listen to them if you feel like it, but know that those are opinions of outsiders, and the weight you place on them depends entirely on you. And no matter who says what, in the end the only opinion that matters is yours, for even if you decide to consider someone else's opinion, it is your opinion of accepting that information as valid what prevails.
Whether you die old or your, My Beautiful Dove, all that matters to me is that you live your time here as happily and satisfied as possible.
Loves You ever so Deeply,
Anya.
1 comment:
Bueno, este es mi "catecismo". Si alguna vez llego a tener hijos, o me toca terminar de criar a Daniel, esto es lo que va a aprender de mí.No sé si son los mejores consejos, pero son las cosas en las que creo.
No te hacen la vida más fácil, porque mentira, todo lo contrario, pero hacen que tu vida sea tuya.
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