Oct 11, 2009

It has been a Week Already?

Today my boyfriend noticed that I haven't written in a while. I though, oh, come on, what's a day or two compared to people that spend months in a row without as much as dropping a line. Then, I saw it wasn't a day or two, but rather a whole week. Oh yeah, a whole, complete week. Well, for what is worth, it has been a stressful week, with a lot of office-errands to run, and some job requests here and there, that had my head spinning because either they were old projects we have already filed away, or it was stuff I had no idea of, specially since some of my coworkers had nicely cut me off the project. (Must have been so contraproducent for them that it was the Boss himself that put me back in without knowing they made all posible efforts to get me out. Oh my... ^_^)

People usually speak ill about my boss, about how he plays favorites, how he takes other people's work and present it as his, and how he's despective with his subordinates. I do have caught him taking credit for things I know to be done by others, and furthermore, poorly executed projects for which I would not only not take credit for, but deny any involvement I may have had. However so far my boss has been nothing but nice to me. Well, here may lay some of the problems with my coworkers: though I'm clearly not his favorite, some are behaving in a mean way with me, and I have heard it is due to jealousy. This is were I wonder, why do people turn to mean behavior when feeling threatened at the job rather than working better? The only reasonable answer I can come up with is: "They can't work any better".

I've been very disappointed with some people also, whom I've discovered not being half as professional and good as they pretend to be. Those who try to impress talking about an issue and throwing facts and analysis, but then you realize that that's the only thing they know and that's the only analysis they have. When knowledge is reduced to having the "templates" or the contact to a given database, but there's no real work, no real research behind their words... that's so disappointing.

There was a moment this week where I felt lost: I had no idea how to make a calculation through any super mathematical formula, nor how to get the data. I was mulling on this when I came up with a solution while walking back to the office from one of the errands. It still wasn't that "high economical" solution that "I should produce", but then I went to talk to a coworker of mine and explained to him what I have come up to and the problems I saw in that. (Minor technicalities.) I was surprised to find out, that yeah, my economics 101 solution was pretty much the only solution presented. Soooo... people ain't working on that? Strange. It pissed me off some to realize that something we should have done in team work was given to him without letting me know, so I simply stood there waiting. That's annoying.

I'm working out some details for some stuff there, realizing suddenly that people in my department had the information all this time. Okay, what the heck is going on here? I have a few ideas about that.

So this week I have basically lost my confidence for a day and recovered it next day, discovered the phony attitude of some of my coworkers, which shouldn't be a surprise, and found out that some of them are not the people I believed them to be. I realized I could have friends also where I never imagined them to be, and then joined a penpal site, where in a matter of hours I started finding awesome people to write to. I learned a new word, or expression: snail mail. Also found out that I'm not alone in loving it, but there's a lot of people who loves to snail mail, and some of them think the same thing I do about it: it's more human.

I meet with Milena and we worked on our thesis, then went to Víctor's and we watched Supernatural. I still love that kid, but I'm finding less and less things to talk about with him. Is there a friendship reaching an end there? That remains to be seen.

A lot of things have ended and a lot of things have started in this week, and not only for me. A friend is finally moving to another office, and she finds herself now submerged in the bittersweet sea of hope for a chance to do what she's good at doing and the pain of leaving a loving circle of friends. Well, like everything in life, you usually give up one thing to get another, that's how it works and that's what makes experiences and changes valuable.

1 comment:

Dragonfly said...

Amiga... gracias por hacer mención mía en el post. La verdad es que la semana fue un poco extraña para mi, por supuesto lo que dices es cierto y los amigos, los amigos de verdad permanecen a pesar de todo.

Fue una semana extraño-ajetreada para ti, pero reconócelo Kari merece sus cartitas....

Besos ;)