Rounding Things Up

The Weekend is slowly reaching to an end, and as it is, my next week is already getting all booked up. It's Sunday again, and tomorrow we are back into Monday, and this time around, that could maybe represent a relief. I'll have to work some this weekend - namely today - on some office stuff, but I also have some personal matters to manage. For instance, today, during yoga - at which I was particularly bad today - the opening line for a story I've been thinking off - and finished in my head already - finally popped up. I guess those horrible inverted positions I hate so much are actually good for something. Yeah, not much "blank mind" during meditation. Rather productive, as that one line already produced one page. ^_^ Then again, as it usually is, as my work week got harder, my Muse decided that she also want to join the ranks of labor, and so inspired me to get this story in my head detached from the world inside my skull, and find ancle in paper.

I had rented some movies, none of which were really as good as I expected them, except The Hunger Games, which I've seen already a gozillionth time already. As result, this week FINALLY I've found a fanfic from this fandom. Maybe it's time to slip into the world of fiction again, who knows.

This is the last day of September, and as tomorrow comes, the day wakes up, the night shifts and the sun rises again, we'll step into October, a month of sheer magic, crowned at the end by the fabulous Halloween or Samhain, whatever you wish to call it. Yoga might not be working 100% on me (today), and maybe I'll have to postpone Archery another month because I'll be joining a seminar on Institutional Risks (yes, that kind of stuff gets me giddy), but still, as fall sweeps darker in, colder, chillier, spirituality also awakens, and with it - strangely mingled - inspiration for the Artist in you.

Farewell, good September, month of the Fatherland, and Merry Meet, blessed October, month of the Spirit in all its shades.

Weekend of Rain and Stuff

Weekend, yes! And if you checked my blog three minutes before midnight, Central European Time, then that's all you would have read. Well, that's what you get when you can't fix the schedule of your blog PROPERLY. but I won't rant this time around, I have a new-ish haircut and I'm happy, so I won't rant about Blogger.

The week at work ended up quite interesting, with lots and lots of work to do, which is great, because that means more and more stuff to keep myself occupied, and all of them are of the very kind I love the most: analyzing and trying to figure out what's not being said. It's economics CSI! Money Detective work! and have I told you just how much I enjoy that? Very.

I also had a little bit of "fun day" all by my own, though I didn't go to the movies, but instead I went on checking an old excentricity store I discovered some 30 years ago, which was packed with crystals, jewelry made from it at rather accesible prices, and witchcraft stuff. Needless to say, I was drawn to it like flies to honey. However yesterday I realized that the store has become another Chinese artifact store. Chinese amulets, Chinese traditional clothing, Chinese statues... and the only not-so-evidently-Chinese thing was a shelve in a glass counter filled with potions and magical soaps. long gone were the pendulums, the Tarot Decks and all other strange things I loved to stare at. That was a bummer. Now I don't have any witchy store I know of which I could think of and let my imagination run wild conjuring up the lives of the people stopping by. I guess I could still buy the stuff I always bought there, the jewelry and the crystals, but then again, with the store turned into a "chinería" as we call them here, it lost interest for me.

There are other witchcraft stores around, some of which I visited once with an acquintance of mine who back then was neck deep in black magic (and Dragonfly-cr knows her too...), but those stores seem to me a little bit... creepy. It's like the one I loved to go to was also creepy, but a bit more... The Craft shop like, while these others are more The Skeleton Key shop like. One has witches, the other might have a couple of zombies tucked in the closet. And yes, I'm curious, but I honestly prefer places more hippie-vibe like, instead of the "this is how you get rid of the lover your husband is keeping". Who knows, maybe it's the Christian in me saying "Yes, God is in everything, but that's no reason for you to be in everything too, so you get the fuck out of there and just run, run until you run into a cross". I'm a chicken, sometimes. (However, no matter how much some stores scare me, I fully support every religion in the world, even if initially they sound weird, like Jedism and Matrixism.)

After my encounter with China-invaded-Pagan store, I went on around the center of the Capital City - which has changed since I was last around - and went to an old cafe-bar I used o love. There I ordered my cocktail of the week: vodka and Red Bull. It was good, it was nice, it was sweet, and I hope the next time I order it they don't forget the vodka out of it. It was sheer joy to be there, alone, going through some work, while the world buzzed around me. It was also quite fascinating to witness how the girls on the table next to mine, who had been there longer than me, received a rather poor service, while I was attended to perfection. As a matter of fact, they not only complained that they had to wait 30 minutes for their cocktails while mine arrived in 10 minutes, BUT that I've got an order of fried green bananas (patacones), while they had also ordered the same and after 20 minutes were told there were none and had to order something else. By the way, yes, they were right in complaining for not getting the patacones, because they were HEAVENLY!

Today I woke up and was 2 kg heavier. Doesn't matter, the patacones worth it. Took mom to the University - I love driving her to work ^_^ - then worked a little bit on the Scrapbook project I started doing for her, but that's nowhere near to being finished, AND then decided to go do some errands. I was SUPPOSED to take Hyperion to the vet, but the cunning cat took his leave when he suspected that a caged trip was looming dangerously over his head. So instead I went and had other errands done, such as preparing some music CDs for a friend of mine. She had shared with me some of her favorite Jewish or pop-Jewish music, and I told her that, well, all I could share with her was Pagan music, and she said she would be interested, so I prepared her a small compilation. I don't have enough Yoga music to compile a CD for her, nor enough Arabic, and then Pagan music is in English (what I have) and it's quite interesting and not everybody knows about it, so there. :-) This is an errand for me, because I don't have a proper CD burner here at home, so errand it is.

Then I went to ask about a small presentation about turning what's negative into positive, but in the end I didn't attend it. Yeah, the reason being that I went to my hairdresser, and since she's moving from her current location to another shop, several of her customers were there waiting for her. I needed my cut NOW, since this is a Full Moon day (today, actually), and I'd love my hair to get a bit thicker (I'm working on getting rid of my layered style and have a fuller mane), and folklore or not, I wanted my hair done now.

I decided also to change my hairstyle. Still long, but something different, as the European style just wasn't cooperating with me anymore. So after talking it over with my hairdresser, we decided to go for a full mane in the back, work on recovering full lenght with no layer, but do a layering up around my face, much like a 90's style. Then as I was getting out of the shop it started to rain and my hair went up in big curls, as it usually does, so I don't know if it does look like what we wanted from it. If not, in 6 week, when I go again, but this time to the new shop, we will have the frayed layers removed and a long side bang cut in it's place.

Now, I gara go, I'm late for yet another day of fun, meeting with Kate and Carrie with whom it's all good cocktails (except that I'm driving) and loads of White Collar and gaping about other similar eye candy and goodies.

Swap-A-Story

A friend of mine came up with a funny thing to do: continued-story-writing. Probably you have done that, I know I have done it at different moments of my life, in different ways and with different degrees of success. Some of them have been blah and went nowhere, but others were downright addictive, giving birth to a story that marvelled us all.

These type of games requiere more than one person (obviously, otherwise it would be regular writing), and a given set of rules or agreements and then each person writes a part of the story, which goes back and forth between all of the players until at one point the story comes to an end. You can make it with each writing a paragraph or two, or do it in a dare style where each player writes a scene and the next player must write a scene where it gives more into the story. Like imagine a story of two wizards fighting, so the players, from scene to scene come up with more complex, interesting and fabulous twists and turns of magic.

A style I once did with a friend of mine was a letter-story. Being both big on fanfics - slash fanfics, to it - we decided to play a game of "secret admirer" or "secret lover", where one of us picked a character from some story, and the other was to play the part of the secret lover. So "Secret Lover" starts sending a letter of love to the picked character. Each of us replied "in character", with Secret Lover trying to keep their identity concealed, while dropping clues, AND the picked character trying to figure out who could they be.

Have you tried that out?

Swap-a-stories usually work with people who know each other well, because unlike stories written by one person, these stories need to click with all the players involved. Each write for themselves, but also for the rest of the participants. It entails writing in a way that opens up the chances for the others to continue the story, and then think on your feet, so to say, to pick where the players leave the story and work it.

I guess not everybody is up to it, but when you are out of reading, or you can't find anything pleasing enough to read, gang up with your friends and scribble up something fun!

Letters on the Wait

So, what was the point with e-mails? It was to communicate quicker. Has it accomplished it? In a way yes, probably, but not for me. And not because my e-mails get lost in the cyberspace, but because a handwritten letter and an e-mail can just take me the same time to compose. Yes, the e-mail gets there as quickly as you press the "send" button - when you do, because I've made myself famous for pressing "save" instead of "send" and then wonder why my friends haven't replied to me yet, but that's me. It's okay, I'm confident in my own humanity and my own intelligence, so a lapsus brutus and it's aknowledgement doesn't diminish me.

But back on e-mails, I'm falling waaay behind with them. I don't know how you work around with your e-mails, but I normally leave on my - what's the name of this in English? - mailbox or incoming tray those e-mails I either want to read later or those I still haven't replied to. It's like with snailmail letter, those I haven't read or replied sit neatly on top of my desk and wait to be replied. In this sense there's nothing I love more than an empty mailbox, because that would mean that all my tasks have been completed.

My mailbox has now letters from people I love dearly, letters that have been composed more than a month ago and I still haven't been able to reply to them. Why? It's sometimes a mix of lack of time and lack of inspiration, or lack of proper mood among other things. Some of them I know personally, and with them I'd rather just meet, cuddle up in a sofa, and chat our heads off with nonsense. With those I don't know personally, I wish I would. With each of them there's an Ocean between us, no matter in which direction we head.

Now work also heaps up - yeah, we've got to "that time of the year", and we gara do what we gara do.

So, yes, you can see yourself on my gmail mailbox, so know that I'm thinking about you every day, even if none of my thoughts is getting typed down just yet.

This is How You Do It?

You go to a bank and you have to wait on a queue or sitting in a chair, staring at a blinking LED screen for your number to be called. You go to a fast food restaurant and you wait for the people at the tellers to serve you. You call customer service, wait for your call to be attended. You wait. Then you expect to be treated well. You expect to receive answers and solutions. You expect quality. You have expectations. You feel entitled to the good job of the people attending you. Well, you are paying, right? Why shouldn't you get the worth of your money? It's curious at the same time how many people, at the same time, do a mediocre work at their own jobs and expect others to be contended with it and consider them for it. They will not doubt before asking for the head of the kid at Subway who forgot the olives from their sandwich, but when they slap together some sorry ass work and render it at their jobs or at their schools, they actually expect a raise or the highest possible grade because "they did what could be done". Question: what makes YOU so special so that your incompetence should be tolerated but that of others shouldn't?

As it happens, this double standard also applies to everything in society, and we are currently seeing it smeared thick on politics. I feel tempted to write about the American politics, but 1. I already did that and just erased a ten page post, and 2. I'm terribly biased in favor of President Obama, so I won't do that. 

However, the facts are quite similar everywhere around the world: everybody has something ill to say about others, everybody feels entitled to the maximum effort of others, and they resent it with anyone asks them for anything but the minumum. Some resent being asked at all! the rich and wealthy, the corporations resent Government participating in the market, regulating, giving "handouts" (subventions, welfare, etc) to those who have less. They resent Universal healthcare and cry out that their money shouldn't go to pay the medical services of poor people who don't even work, BUT when their greed fucks things up for them, and they can't buy themselves another island in the Pacific, THEN they demand for a bailout. They also demand constantly for tax cuts and all sorts of subventions "because they create jobs, and investing is productive". Yeah, unlike getting a job at a company like - uh - yours? Because the company is productive by itself and the people working in it and not getting the tax cut... isn't?

Government held companies are bad. Yes they are! You can't buy stock to them because THEY BELONG TO THE PEOPLE! You can't even compete with them because while your sole intention is to make a profit out of selling stuff to people, Government owned companies look forward to give a service to the nation at an affordable price. You know, as in "make sure everybody gets to receive this service or this product". But let's cut here, I'm not saying that all companies should be owned by the Government - though I do believe that services that improve the lifestyle of the nation should, such as education, healthcare and infrastructure, as well as security and first response services.

Some say that they "support companies and corporations" because "that's were growth is and everybody should be allowed to become an investor and have their own company". Yeah... assuming everybody has been born to be an enterpreneur. I don't, I like being an employee, I like the safety, I like knowing I'll be able to retire one day and I love helping build a bigger project than that I could achieve from my own means. But even if you have the enterpreneur bug in you, how are you going to get the capital you need? And once you do, how are you going to make sure you survive, and you make a living out of it? Sure, you can say "Bill Gates did it" and "Aristotle Onassis did it", but you are neither, and this isn't putting you down, this is being practical. Maybe you can do it, maybe you have that great idea and you can do it, but what if every one of your neighbours did it? Truthfully, what would you think would happen?

If no workers were left, who would take your call at the Customer Service? Who would make your car? Who would do the sitcoms you watch on TV? Yes, you need workers. And you have to pay those workers. But then, you want to pay as less as possible to those workers - and don't come with the "the more valuable the worker is, the more money they can make" because you and I know perfectly incompetent people who make more money than those who do make a good job. And you don't want to pay taxes and healthcare and what nots because if you don't want freeloaders enjoying your money.  Well, then you should pay your workers enough so that they can afford all they need to live. But you don't want to do that either. As a matter of fact, if you are employing Jimmy, why should you give him enough money so that he can feed, dress and school his child? It's not like it's your child! Why should you pay for a child that's not yours!?

I've seen phrases on the Internet that say stuff like "Maybe you expect too much from others because that's how much you are willing to give", and that sounds to me like bullshit. Do they really? There's a play of rationality here being trampled by extremism and dumb shouting.

When you apply for a job, you should do so with the compromise to give to that company your dedication. Now, I sid DEDICATION, which is different from LOYALTY. You are not to follow blindly, and don't question, but to work with integrity. It's not about doing your best effort, it's about doing what needs to be done to get the job done. And if you can't, resign and give let someone else do the job. If you don't know foreing languages, don't apply for the post of translator. If you are running for President of a Nation, don't pretend to rule and protect the interests of only a handful of people, just like being CEO of a company doesn't mean that you'll take care only for one tiny department of it and the rest can go to hell.

However, talking about this is sadly a vain exercise. the great majority will bitch about others, demand almost a slavish job from them, while they expect to be treated like Ceasars, do nothing and be praised for the battles they haven't even taken part of. It's not the Mayan Calendar, Nostradamus' bullshit of the Apocalypse what's going to end the world, is out leaureated incompetence.

Simple Pleasures

I've been knitting again. Recently I decided to make myself a cloche hat, which I crochetted from olive coloured yarn. I haven't done any chrochetting or knitting in quite a while, and truth to be told, I enjoy it a lot. So, decided to enjoy again the experience, I added it to my List of 13, and so my new hat was born. Now, when I've got the olive yarn, I also purchased some mixed yarn - one of those that have different colors -  because the mix was interesting. I call this the "avocado mix" yarn, because it has the colours of avocado. The rest of the mixed yarns were all ugly and basically in the scope of vomit with different degrees of aging.

As you know from a previous entry, the avocado yarn was intended to become a hat as well, but it didn't happen as it was too thick for a hat, so I started knitting it (knitting gives you a thinner fabric than crochetting), and now it seems like it's going to become a jumper. A friend on mine told me that though she loves knitted and chocheted things, she never learned to neither knit or crochet because the person who would have taught her wanted to force her to learn. Well, I guess this wouldn't work for her. Forcing skills or knowledge upon others never comes out well. Just because you enjoy plaiyng the guitar it doesn't mean you have to forcibly make others love it too.

However, just because someone finds mental peace and happiness in something, it doesn't mean it only exists there. We all have simple pleasures. Isn't it about time we lure them back into our life?

The Weird of Time

Monday again. Back to the office. Hn. Well, a friend of mine - Dragonfly - is having her birthday ^_^ Yay! Happy Birthday Libe! Got her a nice virtual cake and everything. Real life presents shall wait until we have a real life meeting, which has been postponed so far. Yes, our presential presence is bound by our unability to be ubiquitous, just as we are on the cyberspace.

The sense of time has changed. Back in the days before the Internet and the extensive use of computers, our days were filled with tasks but more leveled. You concentrated more in less things and did them well. Now you concentrate less in more, slap here and there half assed solutions (unless you belong to our old school kind, which tackle less, focus more, do it better, and are called slowpokes by the whatever-solutioners), and find out that you end up with loads of time to linger online, but actually have no real life time to lead a real life.

Time, what a strange thing. A whole dimension that can't be touched, can't be moved, and yet we act like we can fill it. Hn.

Sunday Without Yoga

Sunday yoga is a thing of wow. The day start a little before 8 am, because at 8 am my lovely boyfriend and I meet over the Skype, then yoga, then back home to wash my hair and shower down and then goes on the rest of the day with whatever that has been planned. Well, not today, since personal nature got in the way of my plans. Man, where's my menopausia, my grey hair and my retirement staying? I want them all now! Yes, I was born old.

So, instead of stretching and twisting and flowing through asanas, I fell back in bed after talking with my boyfriend, with an aching waist, and went on watching TV and knitting until my avocado-mix colored yarn run out - which happened quite fast. Now I'm doing laundry - also part of my Sunday program - and  waiting for lunch to be ready, when I'll FINALLY have acorn with margarine. Gara love the cooked acorn coated richly with slowly melting margarine that threatens to run down your elbows. Ah, that's the Indian (Native ... Native-what are our indians?) Spirit in me.

My friend Al and I held circle yesterday to celebrate the Autumn Equinox, and this time around it came out rather well, though it was strange to hold this ceéebration while the rest of her family - save her daughter - where coming and going. There are a couple of rought patches going on there, maybe in all the wrong places, who knows, but it got me thinking time and again about the meaning of this celebration for her, and how the rest of her family were taking this circling thing. The languages to talk to God can also become the languages in which men choose to talk to their peers or themselves. I can only hope that a path of acceptance, personal choice, and respect for nature brings home the message these hearts need to be soothed and healed.

It's Sunday and many stores are closed, but I keep thinking about walking to the downtown (though rain looms dangerously close to Earth) to fetch myself more avocado-mix yarn, maybe getting a few new movies from the blockbuster for later. Well, who knows? Maybe I'll get myself The Hunger Games again. :-)

Blessed Mabon

Happy Autumn Equinox to all of you! Here we are, celebrating once again a day when day and night have the same weight, the same lenght, but unlike at Ostara, from this point on nights would be dominating time, days will become shorter and with it comes the chill, the cold, the winter. Rains are more abundant now in this part of the world, and so as the skies grow dimmer, colder, grayer, the land becomes more lush, more green, cluttered with life. At the same time, at home he dominant colors are warm even though the weather isn't. Red, oranges, ocre yellows and golden browns cover everything, preparing to give space for the silvery grays, the whites and the hundreds of coal and tuned off colors.

If I recall correctly, last year's Mabon post talked about the balance. (I'm not checking and cheating, though I did look up the post since I wanted the link to make your check up job easier, but I remembered the celebration we had with some friends and the topic we choose.) Though it always applies to this celebration, today I would like to highlight another aspect of the celebration, specially related to Mabon.

In the Pagan calendar Mabon represents the Second Harvest. It's a time of abundance, when you reap the largest fruits of your work. It's the time of plenty, and it's also some sort of Thanksgiving celebration, when you enjoy the blessings you have received, and those you have worked for. It is also the time to start planning for the leaner season, putting away for the winter, for all those days when the land, your work doesn't produce enough for you to sustain yourself and your family together.

In here there are two thoughts I'd like to bring forward. One is to be thankful for the results yielded for or work. How many of us do that? Lean or rich results, there is a result always. Good or bad year, nothing happens in our life that leaves behind no result - at least a lesson for the future. Well, let's be thankful for that. Let's recognize it and cherish it.

Many constantly complain and are ungrateful for whatever their year and their activities yield. Many also preech that you should never be satisfied, or happy with what you have. If you have worked for something, don't look only at the negatives of the result, but also enjoy the positive results of it. When you are working, don't go complaining always because your wage isn't as high as you'd wanted it to be (unless there's an ilegal component about it!), but be happy because you have made an income(1). Be thankful for the results you make, for the progress you achieve in your life.

Maybe you had plans, maybe those didn't work out as you expected it - yes, it can happen - but you can still take this Mabon to celebrate the fruits this adventure yielded. Fruits in the form, of knowledge, experience, better understanding, all of which you would have missed if you wouldn't have embarked in this particular adventure.

A second thought I'll like to highlight is the planning for the future, the setting aside. The richest bounty of our work, the shower of blessings, these can make us think we can go on spending like there's no tomorrow. We take the knowledge and apply it now, we take our wage and spend it all, we gather our bounty and eat it all in a feast. But from all these riches, let's plan forward, let's separate something for when things go uphill or times go leaner. There's one more harvest ahead of us before we retire to meditate and evaluate our work and our bounty, let's separate a part.

In knowledge, let's prepare the plan, draft a path about how shall we apply the things we've learned. In spiritual harvest, let's write down, paint, compose or create something where these experiences get fixed, settled down for us, so that when the times of emotional or spiritual darkness come, we can tap back on the light we hold now inside and revive the flame in us. In the material harvest, let's set a savings plan, let's stock up for the future. Let's fill our basement, let's stock up our barns, let's stash the money in the cookie jar.

Being grateful is about not taking things for granted, it's about enjoying the blessings, being happy for them, but also recognizing that this is the time when we can plan ahead and make those bleaker spots in our future more bright, take the edge fo dread out of them, make them times of comfort and fill them with much happier thoughts than the gloom of being in need and empty.

Blessed Be!

(1) Regarding the "be grateful with your wage" topic, there's something I want to make perfectly clear. Yes, be happy and learn to enjoy your wage. It means that you shouldn't spend all your day munching because you are an assistent and do all the job and get paid 800€ a month, while this new coleague got there last month and is already a supervisor and is making 900€ a month. It doesn't mean, however that since there's an economical crisis and high unemployment rates, you should be thankful for a job at a sweatshop that pays you under the minimum, or a wage so low you don't even cover your transportation fare, are submitted to long working hours and on top of everything have to endure mobbing. No, that's ilegal, it's not right and you shouldn't tolerate it.

Family Fairness?

Everybody has the right to raise their family whatever way they see it fit, right? Right. This however doesn't make some of the decisions some take somewhat hard to understand, to say the least. The other day I overheard some people talking about their position about higher education for their children. To understand it better, we should say first of all that these are people with a US$60.000 yearly income (US$5000 per month). It is not customary in here to give cars to the kids when they get their driving license, so a home with two cars means one for mom and one for dad, and more cars usually mean that either one of the kids bought their own car or one of the parents have an extra or more cars for whatever reason.

So, I overheard this people speaking, and they were saying that since nobody helped them with their college studies, they wouldn't pay college tuition to their kids, maximum give them money for the bus fare, but if their kids wanted to go to the university, they should go get a job and pay for it "otherwise they won't appreciate it". This honestly shocked me.

I'm not a parent, so I can't talk about how hard it might be to raise kids, but as a daughter, I can still tell you what's like to have parents and be raised. It is a fact that no children becomes a carbon copy of their parents, nor they swallow everything parents tell them, but they develop also by their own. That's also why siblings can end up being so different even if treated equally, or why siblings can be so similar even if marked differences were applied in their upbringing. However, whatever the way children end up being, most of their attitudes and character is formed in response of what they see their parents and the rest of their family do. For instance, you can tell them that they must always work hard, but if they see you slacking all the time and complaining about the job you should be doing, then that's what they'll learn.

The capability to appreciate is also learned at home - usually. It's at home with the attitude of the parents how children learn to appreciate what they have, and how to see things for what they worth. This is how they learn to appreciate the fruit of hard labor, or where they learn that they must be aggressive and take things hostage or they won't be given to them, or that nothing has value and all can be disposed because there are always new things coming to amuse them.

I've been to the University - you don't get to become an economist any other way, even if you would doubt that seeing the loads of idiotic economists that flood the news today with the most insane ideas about how to "save an economy" - and if you've been there you know how hard it can be. Sometimes schedules can be so that you wouldn't be able to work and study at the same time. However, some classes can be really hard - REALLY HARD! - and if you have to work next to your books, you'll be moving to hell soon. Just imagine you have an 8 hour job during the day - which is nearly impossible given the fact that most jobs you can get without a diploma tend to be the 12-hour-a-day kind, and lets be realistic: there aren't that many part-time jobs, since most companies prefer workers that compromise with the task. But let's pretend you have an 8-hour a day job, then go to college, where you have one four hour class or two two-hour classes. In the begining you normally have to take the most classes - at least here in Costa Rica - so in the first year you might end up with 4 Humanistic lessons a week, one artistic or sports class, and let's say you also take two pertaining the career you are picking. That's 7 lessons. Even if we pretended that all classes were two-hour classes (which usually is hardly so with the introductory classes of the career), you'd be spending at least three days a week at college.

Say you start working at 8 am, you end up at 4 pm, classes start at 5 pm and you get out one day at 7 pm and the other two at 9 pm. Then get home. Question: and when do you study? According to many teachers, you should study at least twice as many hours on your own as you do at class. Now you might smirk: "Come on! They say that, but nobody does that!". Yes, you are right. And I guess all those $150 books you bought, with over 800 pages just read themselves, right?

As a matter of fact, whether you like it or not, when you are at college, you do spend at least twice as much time studying on your own as you do sitting in class. Then there's the research, and I don't mean just sitting in the library, but often - and depending on the career - you must do lots of legwork, go from Institution to institution to get the information you need to prepare a paper. Sure, today you have Internet and you can Google lots of things, but there are still things - many of them as a matter of fact - where you must go to this or that place to get the most acurate information. Yes, the Internet doesn't hold (yet) everything. Interviews, conferences, in site data gathering... all these are part of the College Student life. How are you going to complete them if you have to punch a card at a factory because your $5000-income-parents are too cheap to pay off your semester and books, which in the most expensive of cases runs up to $2500? (And not up to $400+books a year at a public university, which are the best in here?) Oh yes, and in public universities, not all classes demand expensive books, and many can be lent at the library. Also, many students often team up to buy each a book and then lend it to the others so that they can xerox it (at least when that wasn't exactly ilegal).

Maybe it's because my folks paid my studies - and it didn't hurt that I had a scholarship! - but shouldn't parents make sure their kids have all possible advantages in life? You don't want them to take everything for granted. Good, start by teaching them from early age that things shouldn't be taken for granted. That doesn't mean to give them lunch only after they've moulded the lawn, or washed the car, it means to show them that you don't take them for granted. Make a rational use of things and explain to them that we have streets and parks because people who work pay taxes. Well, for instance.

Parents forget that children owe them nothing, and children aren't some strangers looking forward to squeeze them out of their hard earned fortune. If they are so, when what have they done to teach them that? Nothing? ... Really?

When you could afford to send your children to college without forcing them to work, and yet at legal age you dump them out on the street, kick them on the butt and tell them "you are on your own now", you are teaching your children the following:

1. Those who love you don't care about you

2. You can't count on those who love you

3. Life is hard and you have no support but your own

4. The only way to survive in life is through looking for shortcuts

A working student won't be a dependable student. Oh, they can be good, but in order to get all that research done either they have to slack at work, or they'll have to rely heavily on their classmates losing valuable experiences and the knowledge acquired only on the field of academic work.

Yes, there's a lot of people who had to work and study, maybe even work, study and take care of a child or a sick/handycapped family member. Their lot was hard, and if you ask any of them they would tell you that yes, they did it, but they would have prefered to be able to just study.

This seems much like the 47% freerider speech of the Republican candidate, Mitt Romney, where people who receive aid are depicted as something less than decent people. When you make sure your children can have a college or university education without worries other than their studies, you are teaching them a very valuable lesson - if you've been a really good parent and have taught them other values an principles through the prior part of their life. You teach your children that it is okay to help others get access to a better life. It's okay to share your income, promote further education. You don't have to say a word, but from this they'll pass that to their children (if they choose to have children, if not, trust me they'll still pass it on). They won't frown when part of their income goes to Social Security, which in turn will go to pay for the medical care of themselves but also of people with lower income or no income at all. It won't bother them to know that part of that money goes to take care of children and elderly. They'll learn about the value of solidarity, that though they are responsible for themselves and should look out for themselves, life happens in a social environment and as such they should also care for that society.

They'll learn that poor people don't think they are entitled to welfare, but they'll learn that people have the right to a dignified life, and as part of society we all should make sure everybody gets those chances. They'll learn that the solution isn't in the charity of the wealthy, where they give from what they have left, but that the whole of society is a responsability of all those who are part of it, and that the solution is in actions based on equality and solidarity.

But then again, it all depends on what have they been exposed from the crib, and if you raised crows and leeches, or an obnoxious Paris Hilton, no stupid "Now you are on your own" policy would undo the damage.

Don't Be a Victim and Don't Victimize

From the outside it's often quite easy to judge a situation. You are not there, you have nothing to lose and you can keep your head cool. From Costa Rica it's very easy to be smart and talk about what should and shouldn't do the Governments of Greece and Spain. From the bleachers it's very easy to strategize a game of football and say what should or shouldn't do the players or the coach. This however, doesn't mean that the only who are right are those who are neck-deep in the given situation, because theere were the spectator is lost in generalities and partial information, the player is often short sighted and concentrates only on the details instead of trying to see the whole picture. Well, as you can imagine, it's the same with abusive relationships. I can't say that everybody has been in at least one abusive relationship - at I hope from the bottom of my heart that the number of people in abusive relationships is smaller and smaller day after day - but the fact is that there's many people in this sort of situation.

Now, an abusive relationship isn't only between a couple, but can also happen at work, among friends or family members. Some cases might be harder to identify, we might be prone to invent excuses for the abuser (they are just children, they are the boss and have a lot of pressure, they are very old and every old person is cranky, they are sick and are suffering enough as it is, they aren't as lucky as we are and they need our help, they are teachers and very smart, and that's why the demand so much from us...) but this doesn't erase the fact that there is abuse. Whatever the case is, the healthy thing is to look for a way to end the abuse, yb either mending the relationship properly and cutting up every way for the abuse to perpetuate, or by ending the relationship. However either way requieres huge amounts of strenght, confidence and endurance, which many people don't have. It requires clarity to recognize the abuse, and calm to realize that the abuse doesn't come from real power, but from the fear of the abuser.

To deal with an abusive relationship you'll need a clear head to think about the best course of action, and it is advised to have support. Friends, family, and even professional help if you can afford it or contact non-profit organizations who aim to help people like you, or to make use of the professional services that are often available for free at your work place or study center. From my personal experience, I had once an abusive relationship with a boss of mine, who tried to cloak his insecurities and lack of vision or knowledge about what should he do, by turning life at the office into hell. To break the abuse started first by approaching him looking to mend the relationship. Seven times I met him with a clear proposal, solutions for the existing problem, specific issues, and yet nothing happened, so with the aid of a work psychologist (and a psychiatrist, so don't let things go that far) and LOADS of good advise from my friends, I requested a transfer and got it.

Breaking a cycle of abuse or an abusive relatioship isn't an easy deal, and it happens that the people in that relationship get beaten into a state of vulnerability where they truly believe that there's no way out of it. In times of crisis, with unemployment hitting the fan an abusive workplace seems better than no job at all. When you have no degree, you are often made feel like your job worths nothing, and that you have a job because someone took pity on you, so that you must take all abuse bestowed on you and still be grateful. Sentimental and familiar relationships are even worse, because in those the abuser don't play (only) with income, but with feelings as well. In those they manipulate a particular knot of love where they make you feel worthless, take away your self esteem and make you believe that the only love that counts and gives you value is theirs. But they don't give it, they with holding and force you to try and get it.

Such "games" can scar a person deeply, and it's even worse, because there's hardly a place to seek haven from this abuse, because, where could you turn? When your parents, your partner, your children are beating you down and abusing you, who's there to hold your hand, who's strong enough, who can sneak in bed with you, hold you tight and kiss your hair while murmurring reassuring words into your ear? "You don't believe that for a second, Honey. You are strong and beautiful and the world loves you just the way you are."

Disheartening as it is, if you reach out, you will find a thousand hands reaching for you, millions of shoulders for you to cry on, and gozillion smiles there for you, ready to chear for you en encourage you. But when you don't reach out, when you keep your head bowed, you remain in your chains taking the undeserved punishment, you are also prone to become an abuser. It's not unheard of the case where someone who has been taking abuse from someone, at one point turn against others to discharge their anger and frustration. The abused partner takes it out on the children or other family members, or even friends who have been supporting them. They often try to divert their attention from the abuse they receive, and by abusing someone else, exploding at the first available chance and making the matter much bigger than what it was in the first place, and then seeking the alliance through this crisis with no other than the abuser.

This is widening the circle, this is giving more space for the abuse, and no, the abuser won't drop the earlier victim to fall upon the new one. Abusers don't drop their victim for as long as they are vulnerable and alive. This is making the mess bigger. Remember that the abuser is taking it on you because they don't have a real hold of power, because they are desperately seeking to pretend being someone or something they are not. When you are being abused by someone and then you explode on someone else, isn't exactly this what's going on with you? You feel weak, powerless, taken advantage of, hurt, and so, you take on someone vulnerable to you to pretend that you are determinated, strong and powerful? All you really feel you are not? You try to pretend that you are in control of the situation, when in reality you don't feel in control of anything, and actually you aren't in control of yourself and your own feelings?

Yes, the abused can become so accustomed to the abuse that they'll spread it on their own as well. It's like that's the way life goes and that's what you pay instead of love or recognition.

And this goes around also at offices and schools. The coworker abused by the boss, takes it out on the rest of the team, or on someone in particular. If the boss screams at them or demand them some irrational job, then they take it out on the newby, the peagent or the receptionist. The kid abused by the teacher bullies their classmates. When does it stop? When someone stands up and does something about it.

If you are in a situation like this, or you know someone in such a situation, do something about it. Abuse isn't a natural state, and when you are spreading it around you, or you see someone spreading it around, think real hard about it, because it means that things have just gone much further than you think.

Abuse isn't just beating up someone. Abuse is controlling too. Jealousy, trespassing personal spaces, interfeering in personal decisions such as what to study, where to work, what to wear, what kind of hairdo to have, which friends to have, whom to see or not to see, what to read or not, and so on. It goes from outspoken orders to belittling, disrespectful comments. You don't have to take them, nor you need to reply in kind. You need to keep your cool, or either calmly retire or request the person to leave, then you need to decide what to do. Stop it before you start hurting in response to the harm you receive. But if you've gone that far, the next time the mean comment tickles your tongue, or the shout bubbles in your throat, maybe your fist raises above your head, stop yourself, think if you want to become what you hate the most. There's time, revert it, stop it and break the cycle. Don't spread the pain, spread the love. Spread the happiness.

Post # 1000

Guess what? This is post #1000! Kind of. I think Blogger counts on the drafts as well, and I haven't cleaned those out properly, but still, THIS is supposed to be post #1000. And I won't make it a smart post, so let's just open the babbling box and babble away.

I submitted my book list for the Swap Book Club, and now I'm waiting for whatever will come next. By some magic procedure a secret friend will be assigned to me, and I'll work to get her one of the books from her list. It's like getting a present with insurance! Then, as I was thinking about Spirituality (out of the blue), I came over pictures of Native Americans and suddenly I developed a fancy for feathers in the hair. I'd love to wear feathers in my hair, like the ancient Native Americans. I have done that before, basically by sticking feathers into the tip of my braid - when I use my hair braided - and have loved it! Then again, I love feathers, and I tend to collect them when I find them on the street or at parks. Yes, I have heard about diseases sprad by birds and how everything from birds could sneak up on you and kill you dead, but so far feathers haven't killed me.

But what was thing thing about Spirituality? Well, a friend on the Twitter was fighting with other friends about this "misconception" in declaring that religious people are prepotent. This friend said those who supported this thesis were guilty of "Argumentum ad hominem" (which in plain English means that you at dragging a debate into the personal ground. Like when somebody can't attack your arguments, so they attack you). Now, though we could argue that just because someone is religious that doesn't make them prepotent, we should take a moment to decide who do we call religious and what are their characteristics. Religious people go to church or whatever their peculiar religion demands them to go to; the attend to their prescribed rituals, know their sacred texts, study their scripts or pergamins, holy books and stuff written around it, and living them or accepting them or whatever. Am I short in here somewhere? Now, from where I'm standing, this leaves little room for tolerance, specially when time and again the message that it is their duty to "spread the word" is hammered in their heads time and again, and they are told time and again that anyone who's not following their path is going to burn in hell for ever and ever an all eternity.

It may not be true to other religions, but it my experience it is true for Christians. Handpicking verses from the Bible and interpreting them as they see them fit, yes there is a sytematized movement to basically bully people into Christianism. In my personal opinion, when you start by nudging others towards Christianity - even if you come from a good place in your heart - there's a prepotent behavior.

In comparison, Spiritual people are not necesarily following a particular religion, wrapped in particular rituals and attending church regularly and feeding from it. Spiritual people connect directly with God, The Universe, The Divine or whatever they call that Spirit, energy or force that pulls their souls. They can talk to it through the frame of a given religion, but they don't make that religion true or right, just like English isn't the True and Only language of the world, and Spanish or French aren't false. Spiritual people don't try to force you down any particular path, but rather respect your path and if they can help you, they will in your terms, or offering the aid they can give instead of pushing it on you. Whether you think that Jesus is your only path to salvation or you believe that meditation can open up your soul and lead you to enlightment, they accept it, don't disqualify any path and understand that all of these are paths to take you to a better place.

There's crap everywhere, there's prepotent people everywhere and prepotency isn't exclusive of religious people, but when you follow a path that encourages you to disregard those different from you and "save them from their mistake", then call it what you want, defend it how you like, but for me that's a free card to be prepotent.

I've Been Accepted at [INSERT NAME] Book Club!

Oh joy and happiness! My darling friend Dragonfly, who is a well known librivore - though work has kept her in an imposed book-diet - finally got me linked, connected and hooked to a fabulous Book Swapping Club. It's a rather impromptu club that was born between a few friends and that has been growing exponentially (kind of, maybe more like a conservative linear growth) as friends bring or more and more Readers Anonymous into this group that seeks no cure for their addiction, but actually encourage to keep on the dark path of letters and stories. The girls from this club are scattered around the Hispanic world, from what I understand, with many from Mexico, and at least two from this corner of the planet. Each year we submit a list of 10 books we would like and then we get a "secret friend" assigned, for whom we'll get one of her books. Books should be sent on time, or a Terrible Book Swapping Curse will fall upon you. Evil karma will hunt you down and make your life miserable, creating a trail of mishappenings around you.

A big zip will appear on your nose right when you have this big interview or a long awaited date with Adonis Reborn. Your stockings will rip caught in an egde at the office right when you were going to meet with your girlfriend at this fabulous new place were you were planning to go on guy-watching. Your coffee will splash on your white shirt the day you have no sweater or blazer around. Your heel will break at the very begining of a day of shopping. Yes, you should avoid the curse.

This Book Swapping Club works like many swap groups, only it does center on books, in comparison with more general groups, and since we are so far from each other, it also goes on rubbing the love for snailmailing. :-)

This will be my first year, and I've already were made feel at home with the girls. They are all so great! We shall see how it goes.

Horoscopes

Today's Horoscope: The stars have decided that You are perfectly capable of managing your own life. After all, no matter what the wise say or do, what stars say or do, they can stand on their heads and spell your name across the sky, You'll still do what it pleases you, what you consider best. So go ahead, evidently it has worked so far. ^_^ *nobody tells a Dragon or a Crab what to do*

If you are on Facebook or any other social network, you probably have noticed friends of yours daily publising their horoscopes. Yes, maybe it's an app, and maybe they feel they need this little boost of good vibe to get their day on the go. Maybe. Others never fail to check their horoscopes online, on the newspaper or in their magazines, and often mull about it. Then some others go further, actually consulting astrologists and having their astral cards composed and their future divined. Dude, really why are we doing this? Why do we give something outside of us the power to determinate what kind of day are we having?

Though I do not doubt the effect that the astral bodies can have on us, just as they have their effects on the crops and the tides, this doesn't mean that one star has the power to decide what should you do during the day, or define your expectations. Unless, of course, said star is in direct path to collide with Earth and exterminate us all.

Tarot cards, passages from the Bible, pendulums, runes, stars, omens... none of them define our life, just our attitude towards it.

I thought about cheating, and go back to an earlier post were I went on rambling and then at the end I remembered what was the topic I wanted to develop, but then decided to leave it for later. I just couldn't find it, nor I was interested in going step by step finding the elusive topic. So this leaves us with another rambling post. But aren't those some of the best ones?

Sunday finally came, and with it the knowledge that tomorrow is Monday and I'll have to wake up early and go to work. My day planner is also getting filled up with a lot of programs, both work related and others related to things I like to do. I went over my List of 13 and prepared the fifth one. Goodness Gracious! I'm already making my fifth list! Isn't that something? For this list I'm giving a second chance to stuff I didn't complete on the fourth list, others are getting striken out (like going to the movies, since you know already fairly well what I think of these crappy movies) and changed for others, such as "Having at least one Fun day a week". This can be applied to movies, cultural activities, time spent with friends and so on.

One thing I added to this list was to make myself a hat. ^_^ Gara get myself some dark yarn in black or brown, dark green or blue or something like that and try and make myself a cloche hat. I totally love cloche hats! The idea came after I decided to make a badge holder necklace for myself, based on the idea I've seen in Finnair. I've already showed it to some of my friends and have been considering making some for selling. Little plans that always come handy in times of crisis. Yes, I guess Roo's suggestion finally caught up with me. We shall see how it goes.

Goodreads: Heaven by Jet Mykles

Heaven by Jet Mykles

My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I know I've read this one before, so why did I read it again? There are some things about the mind that you can't simply get. So for future reminder to self: Jet Mykles is a female writer who doesn't hide it. The story is peppered all over with unnecesary description of the scenary and little character development. It reeks of fanfiction all the way from the picking of the flamboyant names (also quite a female quirk. Male writers care for the action and name their characters Jim or Tom, females prefer the flourish and linger on details, as if describing a fashion or decoration magazine, and name their characters Floryan or Tyler), to the need to clearly distinguish characters chromatically. The pulling of the writer's personal life sphere into the story was entirely unnecesary, but it served to scream OTAKU!

Not much sense, not much plot and sex scenes were all based on regular fanfiction commonplaces and formulas.

For a light reading is okay, if you have a lot on your mind and want to disconnect a bit. For the any other purpose, pick any other book.

View all my reviews

Independence Day

The two most patriotic days in any Costa Ricans' life - and I believe that in the life of many Central Americans too, and dunno if it really extrends to any South American country - is September 14th and September 15th. As you already know, yesterday was out Lantern Day, for lack of a better day, and today is our Independence Day. Our Anthem is sang passionatelly here and there, in accordance to the civic program (though mostly the 14th at 6 pm, up to the point that I've seen people at class or at work make a pause to put their right hands to their hearts or stand straight and sing it). School and highschool students march on the streets with lanters and school bands on the 14th, and then with flags and battoons on the 15th. And the school band, of course.

Something you should know about Costa Rica's independence is that though there were many citizens - mainly creols, which means Spanish descendants born in here - who wanted our Independence, there was also people who was rather comfortable living like a Spanish colony. So when the news of the Independencs arrived, our politicians (for lack of a better term, I know we call them "cabildo" in Spanish, but have no idea what would be the name in English and today my Internet connection is slow and I don't want to go looking for the translation) saved the message for themselves while they deliberated what to do. The message they sent back was basically that "we will wait until the sky is clear". In other words: Costa Rica planned to wait with the declaration until things settled, the air cleared out and we knew where we stood. It is said that this sentence marked the temper of Costa Ricans, who procrastinate with everything, and wait for the last moment, often to make sure there are no changes.

There were three groups when debating this decision. One wanted to pledge alliance to Spain and reject the Independence, another wanted to take the Independence and become part of Mexico (if you know where Mexico and Costa Rica are, you might be thinking now: wait what? And what about all the countries in between? When I was little and learning about this I asked myself that question and wondered if Costa Rica was going to grab the country and switch it with Guatemala or was planning to dig out the land and ship it and become an appendage of Mexico. Back then it also bothered me that given the form of Costa Rica, where would it fit). A third party wanted absolute independence, and start anew with a country and a government of our own.

Again we can find mirrors in countries about personal choices and behavior. In everybody's life there comes the time when you are given the chance to be independent. Sometimes it comes many times. You become legally an adult, or you get out of a job -  fired or resigned, that's not interesting now - or you get out a relationship, abandon your old religion, step out of an old club, you name it. The situation you've left might have made you feel tied down, or might have made you happy and feel without worry, and when it ends - either because you broke out of it, or because it was ended on you, or you've outgrown it, and you felt it in yourself that this isn't working as it used to be - we can often feel indecision before the same three paths Costa Rica had: you can reject the "independence" and strike a new alliance with your old relationship, or job or club, or move away from it by jumping into another relationship/job/club, or taking the third road: going solo.

Which is the best solution? Well, wait until the sky clears out, give yourself time to think, because all options have their own set of good and bad. I personally don't believe in relationship that can be mended, but some people do and they do can mend things, so if you are considering breaking up or divorcing, maybe a better solution could be to think about it, sit down and talk about the matter. Maybe you rather break out because there's also someone from the office or the gym you'd really feel the chemisty hitting the fan and why not give it a chance? Or maybe what you really want and really need is time for yourself, time to find out who you are aside from the other person's significant other.

Independence is a fabulous thing that grows from within. Now, unlike in the case of contries, working at a company or being in arelationship doesn't mean that you are less independent, but it does mean that you have chosen to accomodate your independency and compromise to a certain level to make things work. This work as long as you feel that the commitments you take fit within your sense of independence. I certainly don't like to wake up at 4:30 am to go to work, and though my job consumes 48 hours of my week - plus the time driving or commuting - it still fits in my independence feeling, as the money I make ensures my independence otherwiese, AND the job I do allows me to grow within the career I have chosen for myself. It fits in my independence. But if I had to work the same 48 hours, driving the same time, to a place where I did a job I hate, it wouldn't matter the money - in my case - it would go agains my feeling of independence, and I would seek to be free from it.

It's okay to take our own time, and whatever path we choose, we should make sure we choose it by our own, and not to please others. Only then we keep our sense of independence and we feed our happiness.

Friday at last! Wait, I should have a topic for today. I did had a topic for today... I just don't remember where did I place it. So let's just ramble again! It's like journaling-day! Let's dump a lot of little daily non-senses and too peculiar and partilular things, from which no major philosophical break through can come. First thing I think about is "I'll go straight home, straight to bed and sleep until tomorrow". Not that I'm sleepy now, mind you, but the sole idea of being able to go home and sleep until I wake up by myself, and not to an alarm clock, makes me want to make the most of this sleeping.

The New Moon is coming as well, and with it the end of a List of 13 and the begining of a new one. Well, this list will come to its end with lots of holes. Not all my plans were achieved, not all the tasks were fulfilled, and as I look at them I can certainly see through these cracks the change in my life, as I settle back into the old Costa Rican and public employee rhythm. Some points were achieved, but many that are fun, many that I specifically love and enjoy couldn't go through. For some "weekly" tasks - and here I'm bitterly pointing at the demure task of "going to the movies once a week", when back in Hungary I had it to "going to the movies AT LEAST twice a week" - things couldn't be managed without them losing their most important component: being fun. I am certainly NOT going to the movies to watch the same movie week after week to comply with a list, while not liking the movie that much. Do I really don't have the time anymore to do these things, or are they not reasonable given the particular conditions of this country? Not like I added "go skying" when I'm in the middle of Hawaii, but ofthen what you take for granted, what you consider to be the basic milestone of civilization (such as regular movie premiers every Thursday) just isn't so.

Others were doable, but I didn't feel in the right state of mind to follow them through. One of these was reading indexed articles. I love them, I really do, but I've realized that I allow my job to engulf me so thoroughly, that any academical material escapes me. I shouldn't let that happen, so I'll have to work out a system to make this work. Now that I'm reaching the end, will I move the unfinished tasks to the next list? That seems like much of an easy move, and this shouldn't be the point of the List of 13, so after I've slept myself to absolute satisfaction, or maybe before, while checking some of the videos I rented to make up for the movie fiasco, I'll think about them, think why they didn't go through and whether I should pursue them, and if I do, what should be the best way to make sure I keep enjoying them while not making my life into a battle between Must and Fun.

Today is my boyfriend's boyfriend. Called him, and found out that I was the first one in calling him up. Dude, that was at nearly 7 pm, Hungarian time! Something must be done about this in the future. I owe him something pretty for his birthday, but I'm sure he will pick something nice and charge it to my card. ^_^ If not, thanks Hyne I'm already looking up for Plan B. I'm just kind of girlfriend. ^_^ And totally love him, by the way! So he better picks something truly fabulous.

Yesterday, on the other hand, was my friend Al's birthday. As gift I thought up a mini-spa experience at L'Occitane, where they made her a facial with Immortelle. I have had a couple of facials in my life, but the one they give you at L'Occitane (available only at one of the stores, to my knowledge, as not all stores are equiped the same) is by far the best. She has had lots of worries for a while now, so what better than giving her a space to clear out her mind and feel pampered? It would have been fabulous to make it a surprise, but since I had to make an appointment for her, I had to tell her about it (and also find out if she objects, as some people might have a skin condition and can't just use anything on their faces). She told me that she's never had one, and so was tremendously excited to lose her facial-spa-virginity. The girls at the mini-spa were simply adorable, fabulous and great, and the products - though admitedly they test on animals (oh riiight! that's what I wanted to blog about! Oh well, some other time) - felt incredible. Al got to experience Immortelle, and when she got off the spa bed, she looked down right luminiscent.

Great product, great experience, good relax... what every woman needs and deserves. As quietly as I could - though I must admit I failed terribly here at making it imperceptible, I still must work on my "passing information spy-mode" skills - I've got her part of her treatment - the bare necessities for daily life - so this wouldn't be a once in a lifetime experience, but one that she can easily and comfortably relive (even if just partly) day after day. She was happy and that made me happy too.

Today, aside from being Kari's birthday, is our pre-Independence day, noted by all sorts of civic activities at the main squares of major cities, with a lantern procession. In it children from local schools walk around a given route around the city center with lots of paper made lanterns lit with candles (or at least in my time they were all lit with candles, which was fun because there was always a couple that set on fire ^_^), after having sang our National Anthem exactly at 6 pm. At this time the Torch of Independence is supposed to arrive to San José - the capital city - which is carried by a high school athlete, who comes running from the previous  city where the Torch has stopped at lit the local Torch, which remains in that city, guarded by an honor guard again composed by high school students.

Tomorrow is Independence day, but that... belongs to another post.

Blessed be All!

Good or Bad

More often than not, we usually think about things classifying them in two basic cathegories: good and bad. Sex: good or bad. Change: good or bad. Religion: good or bad. Working: good or bad. Money: good or bad. This classification defines the attitude we will show in the face of these things. That's also how we develop prejudices and spread them.

There are things, however that simply are... what they are. Change is just that: change. Sex is just that: sex. Religion is that: religion. They are not good or bad, they are what you make of them. They can be good, they can be bad, they can be both or they can morph into something different when you impose your expectations on them. Sex is sex. It's not love, but it isn't either a procedure to stain a person or destroy their reputation. Change is change. It's not the end of the world, not the big doom or the Mayan Apocalipsis. It's not the big opportunity, the corncupia of plenty which will automatically make all your dreams come true. It's not a death sentence, not the lottery price. Change is just change. So with religion. It is not the "opium of the masses", nor the Big Evil, but it's not either "the only way to salvation" or "the only good and acceptable way of life".

Just as so, relationships are relationships, parenthood is parenthood, childhood is childhood and old age is just old age. Charging things with invented meanings, with the baseless concept brought by prejudices only makes things heavier on us, chips away the joy, takes away the pleasure of exploration. Yes, judge things - you know already that that's the way we know them - but don't pass sentence without giving yourself a chance to know each case. And when you do pass sentence, be aware what are you passing sentence on. Change isn't the responsible for you loosing your job, but the culprit might be a series of bad decisions, either on your side, or on the side of other people. Women or men aren't evil and out there to get you, even if your last relationships were with people who wanted to hurt you and abused of you

Open your eyes, smell the coffee, and as you do, you'll realize that the world isn't as crappy as you thought it was. Blessed Be!