It's odd. I feel so fulfilled, peaceful. And it's odd because I still have so much stuff to do, I ought to be stressed out and crosschecking, trying to fix the world in an Excel sheet and so on, and yet I feel so relaxed, so accomplished. Can't stop wondering why and the only logical answer I can come up with is that I've reached "that" point of stress, "that" level I'll dubb now "ghost stress": you can't feel it, you can't sense it, you are not really made aware of it, but you know it's there because it should be there. The Eye of the Storm. Yes, this exists, it's real and it can attack people prone to have real-based stress. Yeah, not the kind some lazy people have that love to create "stressful conditions" for themselves in order to pretend to have "such an important job" when truth is, they do nothing. Yeah, you are right, usually some mid-level hierarchies present this kind of "self-induced", sought out stress, and therefore they never actually experience real stress or ghost stress.
I'm full of lists and am pencil in hand checking the things I accomplish, and adding the stuff I need to complete but I forgot at first. Some days ago I decided to go "eternal" with the list and made it on Excel. Yep. That's my list... version 01.1. Still gara add some stuff, but hopefully this time I'll have one eternal list I can use for every single trip I'll make from now on. It's pretty handy, and you might wonder why do I make it now when I've been traveling for so long now, and when I'm so close to move home and probably reduce my trips to a scarce minimum. Well, because never before I have been so stressed out about traveling. When I managed the entire thing alone and I depended entirely on myself, it was plain and simple. I made my souvenir and my gift lists in a notebook and that was that. I usually was more loose with my credit card, so packing stuff was more than easy, it was effortless. If I forgot something, I just swap my card at a store. Easy, really. Now I have to be more careful, reduce expenses as much as I can, not to mention I didn't plan this trip, and I still have to plan my trip of december, so... not that much margin for me to operate.
So yes, I have a lot to stuff to be stressed about, but am I? No fucking hell, I ain't. The Heineken Intervention may have something to do with it. No matter what AA says, alcohol can make the difference and yes, sometimes you need a couple of beers at some bar, maybe a friend or two. Or what the heck, just grab a beer, go home turn on the tv and doze the booze down your gul. Man, it felt like heaven! Will see if I can score some more for Friday, talk some friends into a quick trip down the bars. Then I think I have a Smirnoff Ice Black in the fridge, I might have it tonight for the packing-third reload. Tomorrow I might score some more Heiney, and then, for sure, on Saturday I'll take more Heiney for breakfast. Yeah, people at the Airport already know me. ^_^ Always arrive on the brink of hangover. (Never really with hangover, but each and every time I get there tired after a night of drinking booze with my friends. It's tradition.)
Dude, booze may not be the answer, but what an elegant solution!